Entries tagged as ‘Australian politics’
Malcolm Turnbull was never made to be number two. Whereas Howard was happy to be, as he put it, ‘Lazarus with a triple bypass’, Turnball is an all or nothing man. In business there is no room for biding one’s time; strike while the iron is hot. Unfortunately for Malcolm, politics doesn’t work that way. Unlike his business forays, he hadn’t paid his dues in the political arena. Playing the underdog, being tossed aside for no reason, (he lost the leadership vote by three votes), are all part and parcel of the not always profitable game of politics.
Abbott is a seasoned prize fighter in the Liberal arena, Rudd has emerged through the ranks of diplomacy and senior bureaucracy to become PM. Neither of these men have the acumen that Turnbull has, yet unfortunately for the nation, they exhibit the tenacity and perseverance required in the cut and thrust of partisan politics.
Howard’s way was to be equally persistent; it took him three goes to get it right, but when he got it right, he was in the big house for eleven years, longer than anyone other than Menzies. In 2010, perhaps millionaire businessman Turnbull isn’t prepared to endure his time in the political wilderness. Tony Abbott will no doubt lead the Libs to the next election. It is doubtful that he’ll win. Turnbull recognises this. Six years in the wilderness is too long for a man of his decisive nature. If we are to see Malcolm in politics, he’ll either be asked to come back, or dragged back screaming.
Either way the Libs and Australia will benefit. In the meantime we are once again subjected to the miasma of a partisan scuffle between two career politicians, neither of whom have the experience to run a chook raffle.
Categories: bastards & champions
Tagged: Australian politics, Kevin Rudd, Tony Abbott, Liberals, Malcolm Turnbull, Labor
When it comes to political comment, Mike Carlton’s theistic thuggery shows all the finesse of a washed-up footballer. Why theistic? Because Carlton is a believer in one true God, and that is the Labor Party. Any other political belief is anathema to him. No matter the sins this economically inept organisation may have committed, no matter even the sins of the fathers of the current administration, like a Cyclops poked in the eye with a blunt stick, Carlton is myopically blind to any weakness in his chosen deity.
As a result, he has been remarkably quiet of late. Rudd’s emissions trading shambles and much vaunted mass apologies seem to have left Mike on the back foot as a commentator. However with the elevation of Tony Abbott to the captaincy of the Liberals, this one-eyed, wrong-footed, former football thug seems to have found his game.
And for once I agree with him. His target, the Liberals of course, and in particular Abbott’s pecular and worrying choice of ministers for his front bench. What was Abbott thinking, was a question you probably asked when he flaunted himself in Speedos on the front page of the newspapers. What is he thinking, is a question we all should ask.
He has resurrected a team that puts him very left of centre. Is there method to his madness? Carlton doesn’t think so. He is gleefully rubbing his hands in anticipation of the next blunder by the mad medieval monk.
Categories: bastards & champions
Tagged: Australian politics, mad monk, Mike Carlton, Tony Abbott
Breaking News: Tony Abbott will challenge Malcolm Turnbull for leadership of the Liberal Party on Monday.
In a different world, Tony Abbott would be the leader of the Liberal Party. He would also be in the running for Prime Minister. He is a man of principle, a man of conviction. He is a man who can be looked up to as a leader.
Unfortunately for Mr Abbott it is 2009 and not 1969. No matter how strong his convictions, no matter how strident he is with his concerns, the fact remains that we don’t need yesterday’s man as the leader of today’s Liberal Party.
Instead we have Malcolm Turnbull. He has survived a leadership spill, he has grasped the reins during a crisis, and shown he won’t let go. For all his gloss he is the right man for the job. He is the reverse side of the coin to Rudd. Flip the coin and you have Liberal or Labor. Turnbull or Rudd.
In 2009, we are indeed in a period of wanting comfort, as Howard stated. Whether Labor or Liberal, we seem to be happy as long as it doesn’t affect our mortgage, income or payment on the 4WD. The plasma screen is more important than the plight of the boat people. The war in Afghanistan is a long way away.
As long as people place comfort above concern, we will have leaders like Rudd and Turnbull. Rudd, the prime minister for all seasons, Turnbull the staunch but shiny alternative. Both prepared to backpedal given the slightest indication, and both intent on keeping us comfortable and happy. Whether climate change, stimulus handouts or revised immigration laws, the end result is to make us feel safe and comfortable.
Tony Abbott would be none of these things. Unfortunately, his principles, his ideology, and his downright belief in his convictions are more than enough to disqualify him from being our leader.
However, like Lazarus from the dead, or John Howard from the Liberal Party, we shouldn’t write off Tony Abbott. His time may yet come, and Australia could have a Prime Minister who stands on his principles and not on his chances of being re-elected.
Categories: bastards & champions
Tagged: Australian politics, Liberal Party, Liberals, Tony Abbott
Katherine Keating recently experienced some rough treatment at the hands of a photographer while attending an A-List function. Tracy Spicer writes eloquently that by attending such a function as a guest, there is a transaction involved. Ms Keating complained about the incident. It has been suggested that extenuating circumstances may have caused her to forget the implied transaction between A-Listers and publicists.
Maybe she was annoyed by the media attention to her Amy Winehouse get-up. Perhaps she was channelling Amy Winehouse a bit too much. It really doesn’t matter. Had she complained to the media directly, as Katherine Keating, rather than running to her father to fix things, this all would have been a paragraph in the social columns.
Instead a former prime minister, infamous for his belittling, gutter-mouthed, parliamentary privilege protected insults, has called for the privacy laws to be changed. Thirteen years after voters told him to take his bat and go home, he continues to berate those he views as opponents.
In SMH articles he is happy to attack all and sundry, employing near libelous comments filled with vitriol and gutter-sniping, yet now is unable to accept that the worm may have turned. His own daughter is on the receiving end, and ex-PM Keating is demanding a rewrite of the law.
Of course he is.
What father wouldn’t?
Well, perhaps some well-known fathers may suggest that trading on the family name while making a fool of yourself is doing both a disservice to the family and to yourself. Other lesser known fathers may simply say, ‘wake up to yourself.’
Either way, Katherine was courting disaster by behaving badly in a public arena to which she had been invited. While this is about celebrities and their right to privacy, it’s also about acceptable behaviour by a young woman who happens to be the daughter of an ex prime minister. She was invited as the daughter of an ex PM. On that night she was beholden to two transactions. As an A-lister, there was the expected acquiescence to photos. More importantly, as the daughter of an ex prime minister there was the expected behaviour befitting someone who is dining out on the family name.
On both counts she failed.
Categories: bastards & champions
Tagged: Australian politics, Keating, socialite
I found it impossible to listen to Deputy Prime Minister Gillard’s speech to the House earlier today without tears. Her delivery of a powerful and compelling speech was, in my life, the most magnificent Australian political speech I have ever heard.
Having listened back when Gough 
Whitlam gave his ‘well may we say’ speech, and Bob Hawke’s, ‘no child will live in poverty by 1990’ speeches, I was prepared for an underwhelming speech of overstatement.
Expressing this unimaginable loss and tragedy for all Australians, Gillard has realised the importance of the reigns of deputy prime minister, if not leader, and done what few speakers could have executed today, as she addressed the nation.
While her delivery faltered, we listeners faltered many times more, as we were carried along by her emotional words of compassion and strength.
In this time of horrendous upheaval and tragedy, she has shown leadership, direction and outlined a hope for Victoria’s salvation and our nation’s future. The nation will aid the fallen, the stricken and comfort the bereaved.
Julia Gillard can take no small part in that huge achievement.
Categories: champions
Tagged: Australian politics, Julia Gillard, oratory
A previous post likened Kevin Rudd to the Milky Bar Kid, however it seems that cartoonist Bill Leak was already way ahead, as he recalled the 1930s cartoon character Tintin for his caricature of Kevin ’07. 
While we have gotten rid of the orgre from the dark ages, it seems we have elected an apologetic ‘everyman’, a man seemingly for all, yet most likely of real benefit to none. His Milky Bar Kid Christmas handout is fiscally misguided, as is his safety net for the savings and bank accounts of ordinary Australians.
Tintin, you can please everyone for the first few months, but it is then that your government
needs to assume the full responsibility of directing our nation. Because you are in fact the CEO, and showponying, saying ‘sorry’ and handing out Milky Bars to pensioners and the like won’t cut the mustard come next election.
Categories: bastards & champions · politics
Tagged: Australian politics, cartoonists, cartoons, Kevin Rudd, Tintin
October 17, 2008 · 1 Comment
If Kevin Rudd were a TV image, he’d be the ‘Milky Bar Kid’, handing out Milky Bars to all those he can reach. While he is throwing Milky Bars out to the populace, some will benefit, and others will inordinately miss out. The indigenous didn’t actually get any Milky Bars, but they certainly got a ‘sorry’ for all the cream they hadn’t been poured over the last two hundred years. ‘Sorry’ makes up for a lot of spilt milk.
Women who leave a well-paid job to ‘have one for Mum, one for Dad, and one for the country’, also won’t be invited into Mr Rudd’s Chocolate Factory. After all, they obviously have enough of the ‘milk of human kindness’ to take off from work voluntarily in the first place.
In some postcodes, the Milky Bar Kid has dispensed with distributing confectionery, and is instead delivering plasma-screen TVs direct. Apparently it saves on the ordering and delivery time for all concerned.
However, the Milky Bar Kid could be caught short on cream, and only deliver froth. Skimming profits from the Dark Side, who previously held reign in the land of Oz, could leave a very sour taste indeed.
Categories: politics
Tagged: Australian politics, Kevin Rudd
Peter Garrett at last, does something, well I mean he says something. From a rampaging ‘beds are burning’ activist to the milquetoast ‘low on the pole’ Labor flunky, this 80s rock god has certainly morphed, well, dwarfed.
Even though he is merely pussyfooting around the environment issue, he has opened his mouth to express an opinion, a mellow mieow perhaps, rather than the roar we knew all those years ago, but nevertheless, once again he’s clawing away at the entrenched establishment.
Albeit this time it’s the doyen of glamour society, those who can afford to shell out $5.000 for a cat no different from the gigdairy moggie, save for bigger claws and a feral upbringing in Africa.
Categories: bastards & champions
Tagged: Australian politics, rock
In an amazing coup, Cyclops has stormed into Bennelong, unseating incumbent redneck pollie Howard and surplanting him with ‘Joanie come lately’ journo Maxine McKew. Cyclops’ undercover mission was only revealed when he was caught on national tv lurking behind Joanie the Journo as she gushed on about Bennelong and its natives. 
Having been warned of this raid some weeks ago, I presumed ‘natives’ meant the local indigenous dance. However, not satisfied with unseating the incumbent redneck for Gillard’s new gal-pal, Cyclops proceded to drag “It’s Time” Labor veteran, Little Patti, onto the stage.
While Cyclops honked out songs like ‘”Purple People Eater” , Dame Patti wisely chose to perform her showbiz classic, “Blonde Haired Stompy Wompy Surfer Boy from Maroubra”, which went down a treat with the Armenian community at North Ryde.
Categories: bastards & champions · gigs · politics
Tagged: Australian politics
Champion lezzo pollie Clover Moore has taken time off from organising gay parades to stick the stilletto into bastard John Thorpe of the AHA. Thorpe is the bloke who reckons he ‘knows what Sydney wants’, that is, when we go out on the piss. Lipstick Lezzo Moore has called his bluff and sweet talked Iemma into letting Sydney have a glass of wine in a cafe, without, shock horror, ordering a 3 course meal.
Of course bastard Thorpe is livid, bursting Tooheys Old veins left right and all the way to Harbord. 
“Sydney doesn’t want to sit in quiet and peace and enjoy a drink and a chat.” No, he said, we want large barns, filled almost to capacity with pokies, then add lots and lots of TV screens, the bigger the better, all tuned to different channels, but all showing sport. Has he got his finger on the pulse or up his arse?
Hopefully this means I’ll be able to saunter down to my local Italian eatery on the occasional sunny Sydney afternoon, order a glass of vino, and shoot the breeze with other locals. As the restauranteur is making a bit from the grog, perhaps he’ll be amenable to hosting live music occasionally. Salute!
Categories: bastards & champions
Tagged: Australian politics, NSW politics
